Archive for December, 2015

23
Dec
15

Again/self motivated

Why is it so easy to motivate and stay positive for others but not yourself?

I was having a conversation with a cowoker the other day and he was telling me he was an artist and writes his own music and other stuff; I was encouraging him to share his work, come to an open mic and put himself out there. We ended up having a really indepth conversation about life and reality versus our dreams, he told me at the end of the conversation that I really inspired him to put himself out there. I felt so good after that conversation that I went home and began to throw myself into my own work. Now I sit here and I contemplate why it took me motivating someone else to be motivated myself. I mean why can’t I give myself the same peptalk when I’m having writers block or a lack of self discipline.

I suppose that’s the way our brain, well my brain works.. It’s not until I’m scrolling through tumblr and looking at hot girls that I remember I have a gym membership. It’s not until I read something someone else has written that I am inspired, or its not until I help someone see their potential that I remind myself of mine. Are you self sufficient, self motivated? My first thought is yes of course, but then again am I really; are you really? It’s not bad, it doesn’t have to be at least, there are plenty of things in life to motivate and inspire you when you don’t have the energy to do it yourself. My concern would be becoming dependent on it… I want an equal balance, I want to be inspired and I want to inspire myself.

 

 

 

22
Dec
15

Postsecret

 

22
Dec
15

Zoey ♡ Luna

I have a confession, two actually….

14
Dec
15

Again/sensitive much?

… is anyone else here extremely sensitive? To the point that you’re almost embarrassed to admit it? I went to my girlfriends work party this evening and she had mentioned a few nights ago that she found one of her coworkers attractive and of course thats who we end up sitting by by. I’m not sure if I was already paranoid or if she was actually making me feel neglected.. and its not even so much neglected; just that when I was talking to her she would interrupt what I was saying and make a commment to this other person. It only happen twice and again it could just be my paranoia or the fact that I’m sensitive.. or maybe selfish, I’m not quite sure. With the recent events I just feel like I’m always on edge with her. I don’t know, I’m sure it was just me, its usually just me. Its not like I think anythings going on, I just dont like feeling neglected or second.. anyone know what I mean?

11
Dec
15

Again/Laughlin

2015-12-07 00.15.43IMG_10831

Girls trip 2015, Laughlin Nevada

11
Dec
15

Again/Acts of kindness

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So this morning I’m at the gas station, already having a shitty day and its not even 9 o clock yet, I decide to treat myself to a cup of coffee, universe knows I shouldn’t because every dollar counts right now but I do anyway. There’s this gentleman standing in front of me and he keeps looking back and surveying the store, very suspicious. He pays leaves and I walk up to the counter and the clerk tells me he paid for my coffee already. I could have cried right then and there, I know its only a $1.50 but times like this that goes a long way, and that one act changed my perspective for the rest of the day.

Pay it Forward.

10
Dec
15

Again/blue

Do you ever wake in a bad mood for no apparent reason? Have you ever had the realization that life is just endless repetition and no matter how hard you try to fight the routine, the social norm, you subconsciously know you’re going to succumb to the game of life in the end?

I’m feeling blue today. The scary kind of blue, the kind that keeps you trapped in bed with the lights and your phone shut off. I’m not suicidal, yet I just don’t feel like existing..