13
Feb
15

again/welcome back

Do you remember the first time you got an A or B in a class or on an assignment? The gratification of knowing you did this the exact way it was supposed to be done and you did it well!

Do you remember the first time someone called you beautiful or what it felt like to be desired? To be consciously aware that you were someone’s fantasy; despite the bad hair days and the water weight and your articulate way of sarcastically pissing people off, someone wanted you. We get a sort of self fulfillment from succeeding at own standards. I’ve been in school (college) much longer than I should be; well community college that is.

I went to college because that’s what you were supposed to do, not because that’s what I really wanted to do. Then again fresh out of high school I thought I knew it all already, at least I knew who I wanted to be and where I wanted to go. And college was just a side street I had to take to get there. I never took college seriously, didn’t apply any actual effort, in my mind C ‘s got degrees.  Given I was working 2-3 jobs and balancing an unhealthy relationship simultaneously,  but even then school was my last priority.

Nonetheless here I am years later and barely grasping the concept of education and the opportunity we have as Americans (or humans) to learn. So after taking last year off for Americorps, I’ve returned to school and with only a couple classes left to complete before I’m finally able to tracnsfer. I just finished my first semester back, it was a winter quater. So as opposed to a 16 week course it was jam packed into a six week course, talk about welcome back!

2015-02-13 09.27.17      I applied myself, I put forth time and effort and in the end I was rewarded; I I AM capable.

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