02
Jan
15

Again/2015

On a normal occasion for New Years Eve you would find me surrounded by friends and alcohol and dressed like I’m planning a paparazzi attack. This year you found me alone in my self made fort decorated with holiday lights and very cool if I might add, but still surrounded by alcohol and dressed like it’s my honeymoon. I spent New Years Eve alone In my home with the lights off and the countdown on television and I couldn’t have been happier with my decision.

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I’m not really one for making New Year’s resolutions it’s just a bit too mainstream and unrealistic for me, but I can say one of the things I’m looking forward to this year is finding comfort in my own solitude. I want to make an investment in myself, I want to make sure before I fall in love with anyone else I’m in love with me and in order to do that I have to get to know myself. The ins and outs, the good and the bad, my fears and nightmares. Even the things that I’ve tried to forget.

By the end of this year I want to have made a personal transformation. I want to feel like I know myself better than anyone else knows me, I want to feel like I love myself unconditionally.  I want to genuinely enjoy my own company. I wish I could say I’ve already accomplish these things but if I am to be honest I’m 23 years old and I feel like there’s a disconnect between who I am and who I portray; but if I’ve learned anything  this past year its awareness is key, and I’m aware there’s a disconnect and that’s the first step to reconnecting.

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3 Responses to “Again/2015”


  1. January 5, 2015 at 6:53 pm

    Love the setup you have ! So flippin cute & cozy! I myself decided to take a journey to discovering & loving myself after a bad break up 2 years ago. It was difficult at first because I love to love & have someone to call my own… BUT, the single life for the last 2 years has been a blessing. I know more about myself, what I want, & where I want to go. I’m at the point of being pretty damn happy & I know you’ll find your inner peace & love too!

    • January 6, 2015 at 6:31 am

      You have no idea how encouraging this is ! Being single is such a foreign concept in this day and age but it’s really something I looking forward to committing too. It’s nice to know someone on the other side that can vouch I’m going in a safe direction.

      • January 6, 2015 at 6:50 am

        I felt alone too, especially since all of ny girlfriends were in relationships. But guess what? I learned to love myself, & my girlfriends are stuck bouncing around from one bad relationship to another. Someone once told me, “You can’t find Mr. Right if you’re hanging with Mr. Right Now or Mr. Wrong”. It’s definitely been soul cleansing 🙂


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