I started this post last weekend but decided against posting it. I think at the time I was to sensitive to the content.

Being an addict, whatever your posion may be is a never ending road to recovery. There’s never a point where you are fully recovered, no matter how long you’ve gone without your posion. There will always be temptation, some days will be easy and others will be unbearable.

Today was unbearable. I yearned for my drug like an infant does for milk. I woke up with a crave so strong it was hard to swallow. I spent most of the day in bed, drifting in and out of consciousness. Afraid that I would give into my temptation. If was different this time, the crave, it was nothing I’ve ever experienced before. The reason for my drug was justifiable, at least to me at the time. That’s what really scared me, if I could convince myself I needed it, what was stopping me? Well as most addicts know, the drug not only affects you but those that love you as well. That’s why I didn’t give in, not because I didn’t want it but because I knew they wouldn’t want it for me. 

“The blade is almost as sharp as the sip of the posion that burns through your nostrils and leaves your mouth full of cotton, quenching for a sip of water, itching for another sniff and shaking as you hold the razor to your flesh.”

Self harm, Alcohol, Cocaine, Pills whatever your posion, do not let it consume you, you are stronger than your desire.


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