again/30 and flirty

Ya know I had a thought,  it happens often actually.

I’ve declared my thirties are going to be my prime. Forget the 20s, you pretty much drink and screw most of them away anyway. I’ve always been told to enjoy my youth it passes quickly. To do all the things I want now because once I’m attached and invested I won’t be able to pick up do whatever I want, like they think I can now. This would all be great advise if for my 21st birthday I received a passport and black debit card, but I didnt. When you’re in you 20s your life is limitless, the world is at your feet, but in reality you’re pretty much chained with wings. Though the world is limitless, you’re not provided the means to seeks these ‘limitless’ opportunities.

So, my idea is I’d much rather work through my twenties, develop skills and valuable assets, perfect my body and my self esteem. Miss out on all the boose and sex (actually maybe just sex… actually maybe will just cut back not completely exile(; ) Back to the point, I want to do all this to ensure when I’m “flirty and 30”, I’ll also be ballin and brilliant.  Maybe not ballin so to speak, but I can comfortably open a tab and not calculate every drink I have. The world will still be limitless, I’ll just have the means to actually take advantage of it.

It just seems like half my generation is fixated on love, sex, and relationships. Like that’s the end goal in life. Actually I do believe that is one of the end goals in life, BUT I don’t think it’s healthy right now. Hear me out, I’m twenty three years old, some days I wake up and I want coffee with my breakfast, some days I want tea, one day I’m carefree and optimistic, the next I’m a realistic. I’m still at a point in my life where I’m deciding what I want and who I am. The person that’s right for me right now, may not be the person that’s right for me 5 years down the road. That’s not to say it won’t work, that some people aren’t just lucky and find their match early on, but I just don’t think that needs to be my main focus.

Now, the other half of the generation is fixxed on status, who you are and what you have. I’d be a hypocrite if I said I didn’t care what people thought about me, but I can honestly say, I don’t let people’s thoughts of me alter my opinion of myself. I’m not going to spend these 10 prime years of my life, trying to be what’s acceptable to anyone but myself.

So what do I dream of you ask? No longer dreams of falling in love, or meeting a superstar or becoming famous or even winning the lottery. I dream of being 30. Of being independent and smart and sexy and self assured  and financially stable, all while still unattached and carefree. I dream of working hard through my youth so that I can live more than comfortably later in life. I’m okay with making that sacrifice to ensure when I am 30 I’m not tied down and burnt out and miserable or settled in a life I never dreamed of.

Of course all this is easier said than done, but it’s easier done when it’s tried.


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